but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
