Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
