There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
We have started to decorate penises.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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