moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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