thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
