Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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