We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
