She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize