You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
