I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
