It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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