Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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