i'm signing you up for texting rehab
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
How external is "for external use only"?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
