I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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