I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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