so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
