Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize