i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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