I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
