is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize