You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
