but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Randomize