If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
