I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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