so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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