Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
