Me. At least after what I've been through.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize