Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
