I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
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There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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