i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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