my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize