Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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