I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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