As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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