quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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