Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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