i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
