i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize