....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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