check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
