I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Please don't give away my fajitas
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