Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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