she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
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