CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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