I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
