I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize
