sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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