if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
