shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize