i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
