I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
plz talk dirty to me
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
