I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
