We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
