You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
